I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
i had to apologize to my friends for being friends with me
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
you made sure you came back for your bottle of vodka but didn't remember to take your shoes
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
I say we go and bring jello shots with laxatives. 57% sure one of his toilets is broken
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
I'm pretty sure my intestines are bleeding but I'm still going to Orlando to catch that orgasm.
I don't know if should be sitting on a toilet or kneeling in front of it
You had 10 drinks. On a first date.
I just masterbated then started bawling.
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
When I got home he was in his underpants on the couch, eating pop tarts and crying while watching Voltron.
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
Randomize
