Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
Mango Malibu should win a nobel peace prize
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
Its official, drinking for 15 hours counts as a suicide attempt
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off?
Im at that shitty point in my day where I start planning night activities while finger dipping vyvance off of my desk, you got any plans?
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
Teaching my class, used paper clips to fix my hair. Too hungover to be a kindergarten teacher.
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
I threw up a lot of peanut butter last night.
I'm eating chocolate cake while this guy snaps me from the gym. Like I cant believe i actually considered getting rid of this cake. Have fun sweating ima eat this cake 👌
I jumped the fence at the bar last night. My dress got stuck and I ended up flashing the entire patio for a good 30 seconds.
At the 10 second mark everyone started to whistle and cheer. Free drinks all night
You know what...ii have the turtles...were together....i love these god damn turtles...
Randomize
