were having a shit on karen session at work but then she walked in so we used code names instead and she tried to join in like she knew them
Today I ate a sandwich and half my molar fell off, feels like a semi sprayed into my jaw.
I wish i was spraying into your jaw.
is it sad that i can masturbate and get my big O just from thinking about a Tiffany engagement ring?
and she was petting her beer can
woke up this morning with a pool of champagne in my purse. apparently i was saving it for later.
you kept telling everyone how your ninja turtle shell also functioned as a backpack
Escaped ambulance. Meet me at your apartment.
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
I want a battle ostrich, get me a battle ostrich and then come and make love to me
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
Date with Air Force guy was nice btw. And for my next trick I'll talk him into fucking me in his fighter jet at 30,000 ft.
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
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