i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
I decided it would be a good time to smoke on one of my deliveries but then I got the munchies and ate a piece of the pizza I was freaking out so I told him it was our new pacman pizza
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
She spilled some tequila on her hair somehow and I guess I felt bad for her, so I yelled "ROOMIES FOR LIFE" and dipped my hair in my tequila.
if you do the accent, i'll wear the eyepatch
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
WHY IN THE FUCK DID YOU LET ME DRUNK PUNCH STEVE? HE IS SUCH A NICE GUY!
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
There's cereal in my underwear. Was I in your apartment at any time last night? That's the only logical explanation for this.
Guess who was PASSED OUT ON A BMW. I shit you not
Stop it right now
This time face forward
He was chasing Ciroc shots with sips of Captain Morgan... he didn't make it to midnight
don't give me stepladders when i'm stoned.. i woke up to a slice of balogna nailed to the ceiling
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
Randomize
