I hate you, and I hope you have babies soon that you love very much. Then I will steal them and feed them to sharks, and you will be so heart broken that you never want to have any more kids and you'll just hide out in a dark room all day wondering how someone could feed another persons babies to sharks.
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
Your mom is more observant then Randy Newman.
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
Last night you tried to pee on my bed...in the hallway...your room...and the showers. When I finally got you on the toilet you passed out.
Baffled as to how I'm gonna get 150lbs of sand out of my basement.
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
He called his prostate his "boner button".
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
please hold off on going into labor, i might need you to take me to the free clinic
I tried to force my roommate into a sink last night. And I almost won.
the best part was at the strip club when he said he was "here to pick up my wife. she's up on stage.....wait that's my aunt". only in Ottawa.
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
Some nights you do cocaine till 5:00 in the morning, and the next night you teach yourself how to crochet. It’s called balance.
You can't hold me to anything I said last night; I was drunk on orgasms.
Randomize
