they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
I don't think he understands what an important role his penis plays in my level of self esteem
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
It took me three days, but I managed to nearly get arrested on my way out of LA. Made it to the airport. Crisis averted, though. The real crime is, my flight is delayed two hours.
Fuck baseball, getting drunk and playing with kittens is the REAL national pasttime
Omg. I can't go on a date with this man. His kids are too ugly.
she said she doesn't remember seeing me at all last night. ...I was with her for six hours, there's no way she could have been blackout the whole time
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
I would accept a super bowl ring as an engagement ring
Randomize
