Playing drinking games to Nancy Grace totally counts as "keeping up with current events.."
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
You're getting a blowjob this afternoon. This has been your morning public service announcement.
This guy either needs to stop touching me or buy me another drink.
You refused to get in the cab so we rock paper scissored to decide who walked you home and the fat guy was it. So don't blame your poor hook-up choice on me; it was all you.
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
Remember last time I drank with my mom? I asked if I got my dick sucking abilities from her.
There is a check pinned to the wall at Connor's. It's a check I wrote for $1,000,000... To you. Clearly you made out well on St. Patrick's day. Thanks for being too shitfaced to remember to grab that.
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
After we had sex he gave me a thumbs up... fucking A&M Aggies, man
The fact that a spice girls song is stuck in my head is a great sign that my decisions aren't the right ones at the moment...
Sooo does anyone wanna tell me why I threw up a cigarette this morning?
OMG YOU DID TO?!
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