dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
So I decided to start saving money for my abortion in a tomato sauce jar because it says ‘Prego.’ I know I thought it was fucking genius!
Theres a handprint of sauce on my frig, one streaked across my face, a trail of it to my bedroom and sauce all in my bed and i have no idea what the fuck i ate.
i just wanna get shit faced and pass out in some random holly bush with a bucket on my head and stockings for shoes.
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
Sometimes I have to make sure these messages are going to you and I'm not about to give someone in my phone book a heart attack.
Please put me on a plane and hypontize me into forgetting the little bit of last night that I do remember.
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
Stoned. Scared. Bring pool noodle and onion rings.
I'd love you more if you were covered in hot cheetos
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
Got so drunk I broke my sink in half. Not. Lying.
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
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