I just saw a hot homeless man
Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven.
lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
I like one night stands...theyre like crushes for big kids
I don't know who he was, where he came from, or where he went, but he just handed me a bowl of mac and cheese and left. It was good too.
I'm finding that as the end of the quarter approaches, the list of things I refuse to do sober keeps getting longer.
No, he's ok. He just broke his teeth on the stripper pole. No biggie.
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
Also I'm sitting home alone with a big ass bowl of marshmallows right now just eating. It's so sad.
I told her I named my penis "The Spirit of Exploration." That's all it took.
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
Lindsey Lohan and I have slept with the same amount of people. The only thing she's now beating me on is rehab trips and teen choice awards, so really I'm the winner.
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
Randomize
