So. Did i wake up at 430, try to drive home, stop to throw up at a shell, and try to clean out my car and drop my keys in a full dumpster? Yes.
i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
He could be your dad!
We discussed that right before he asked for my number
OMG - This guy with a mullet just told me - it wasn't a mullet - but his hair dresser layered it wrong. It's so walmart in here. I hate you.
well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
come parachute off the vicodin airplane with meee
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
just woke up on the floor with a bottle in my hand. and by bottle, i mean a baby bottle. half filled with tequila.
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
Lighting a fucking bong with a candle. Straight up dedication.
Randomize
