Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
he said 'i want to be the peanut butter to your jelly, just without the crust' and then tried to take me shirt off
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
he grabbed my head and said "you are a horse. I am leading you to water" pushed it down and whispered "Drink."
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
You know how I've been hooking up with my ex? Well he told me he loved me and I said I was just there for sex so let's get it done. He looked sad, but he did it anyways. And life was good again.
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
I just hit your bf in the face with a mustard bottle and the guy at the table next to us bowed down to me.
Do I get bonus points if I get lockjaw after a cosmic blowjob?
He told me I'm a small core of pure evil wrapped up in sweetness, gold, and puppies. He gets me.
That is beautiful
Pregnancy has ruined porn for me. I can't watch a hot chick get it on without being jealous of her perfectly waxed shit. I can't even see my shit.
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
I can't wait to get to LA so I can punch her in the face
Dude...itll be a youre-still-a-dick-but-a-hot-one-angry-hate-evil-spite kinda fuck. This is acceptable.
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
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