the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
My life is over. I farted in open court. Noticeably. The judge looked at me. It echoed.
I sewed up my pants, stole his girlfriends white shirt, and went to work hungover like a responsible adult.
Getting your clit pierced is not something you want to trust to a crazy girl with an ice cube, some vodka, and a sewing needle. Trust me. I learned that the hard way.
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
I'm drunk from drinking bourbon out of a "cupcake sippy cup" at the Denny's bar. What the fuck happened to the goals I had?
I should be rewarded with oreos for not turning into a raging cunt.
Now all I want to do is stay up, drink wine, and look at dragons.
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
My thoughts mid terrible hookup: do people normally read a magazine right about now?
Randomize
