you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
Why the fuck was there a shirtless Mexican in my apartment this morning?
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
Yes, you did come over last night. You also tried to give my dog a blowjob. You got rejected.
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
Maybe you should start carrying pepper spray. You are like the Justin Bieber of lesbians.
true... I just kept thinking "THAT IS A PENIS. OMG THAT IS A PENIS. DOES HE KNOW IM STARRING? STOP LOOKING. OMG THIS IS AWKWARD. PENISSSSS"
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
High me just had to pick the lock on my sisters room because I locked my vodka in there. I love vacation.
i got up, ate a McDouble, then went straight back to bed.
You sure know how to make a day worth living.
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
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