She has an incinerator in her basement. Have you ever incinerated used condoms?
Lmao what?
It's a yes or no question.
ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
he gave me an orgasm. multiple times. the weird stuff he did in middle school is now irrelevant.
Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
I'm way to drunk for this play. I'm about to run up on stage and drop the main character
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
Pictures of drunk me in a bike helmet are like McDonald's collectible toys. There's sooo many, but NO ONE has seen all of them.
My brother didnt wanna sleep with her because she was my friend. Did I miss the memo where we're not supposed to be fucking each others friends? Oh well too late.
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
We banged in my car doggy style with my head out the window. The sky was marvelous and I saw a shooting star. Its destiny; we're meant to fuck forever.
Randomize