Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
I wish i could sleep and get drunk at the same time...those are my 2 biggest needs right now
New drinking game: take a shot everytime Jay-Z is played during the NFL draft.
You kept screaming how great you were at drawing poptarts and you insisted on drawing them all over my forearm
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
It's not like I ment to feed you the shots of vodka, my hand just kinda slipped.
i'm laying here naked in a pile of empty landshark bottles, is lauren still hiding under the toilet?
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
THAT FUCKER WASTED TWO OF MY COLORED CONDOMS! HE DIDN'T EVEN FUCKING FINISH IN IT HE JUST SLAPPED IT ON AND WASTED IT!
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
I just realized I haven't had a date or a potential possibility of a date in about a year. Then I realized I wanted to actually go on a date. But I'm sitting here getting high instead of being at a party. Life.
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
And then he said, "let's have sex and I'll send you home with enchiladas."
Randomize
