Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
genius idea. im gonna paint my penis green like the serpent of sex
I swallowed and made him pancakes in the morning. I feel almost as desperate as Jennifer Aniston at this point.
i know you like preteen girls so i'm gonna offer you some advice...dump a bucket of glitter on yourself and walk into the sunlight. they will come running.
He managed to get his pants on, so the cop just sat there facing us with his lights shining in the car. I made shadow puppets.
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
I wanna give a stern lecture to whoever invented pants cause they are hard right now
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
Dude! I just figured out I can successfully hide a 4oz flask between my boobs without endangering my cleavage! College: conquered!
We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.
I have good news and bad news. Bad news, she's not in porn. Good news, I found porn.
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
You don’t need a wing man if you have a solid hook up on the pumpkin pie
You almost lost your european virginity to a Peruvian man waering a do-rag in a port-a-potty.
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