he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
My new excuse for sleeping with him was in celebration of his cat's birthday.
We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
They both invited me to family dinner Sunday. Secretly dating two sisters just got real.
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
When I got up in the middle of the night, puked in his trash can, and snuck out the front door, I pretty sure he knew it was over.
The car just stinks of weed and we are all sitting here trying to hide it from my mom by rolling down the windows, like it's not coming off my sisters boyfriend
It's like a toaster oven for my penis
Dude if it is ever said "everybody get inside the police helicopter just showed up.". That means it was a successful party.
You're too young to have this sort of Grizzled Old Drunk In Roadside Bar wisdom.
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
I just chased my hot mailman down the street to ask him out and now I am 98% positive he gave me a fake number.
Randomize
