Did u get laid? I went and bought lube and fleshlighted it while moaning ur name the whole time.
Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
I could make wine with my vomit
from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
My hand is eating my burrito and not saving any for my mouth. TRIPPPPPPPPPPPPPPINN!
I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
it's 8 a.m. and there are people having sex at the foot of the strangers bed i'm in. the guy just asked the girl how she lost her baby weight so fast.
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
He fucked me so hard I might have to go to the hospital for internal bleeding
Can I have him when you're done?
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
If you do that, i will make all sorts of uncomfortable comments about my nipples being soft
Who else has a jello penis in their fridge?!
Randomize
