Got a toothbrush?
Dude WTF? His teammate just started talkin to me on fb! Am I walking around with a "I like to f**k gators" on my forehead?
No, it just says ur easy
It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
She is going down in cock block history. He went in to kiss me and she threw her hand between our faces and yelled "DENIED!"
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover.
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
last nights episode of shot friends brought to you by polish vodka and flamingo baseball. pickles cure hangovers.
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
Jailed a totally belligerent hot guy. That was probably my most thorough pat down. Ever.
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
we should paint friendship bongs
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
Randomize
