yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
She actually said during sex "the only thing that would make this more perfect is if we were listening to Lenny Kravitz"
So, obviously, you had to give a fake number this morning.
Yes. Also, we may never be able to go back to that bar again.
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
I wish I could attach your penis to someone I like more than you.
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
You remember that guy i fucked in Ireland who stopped in the middle to talk about why he had 8 pillows on his bed? Yeah he's following me on twitter...
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
I just found a half a joint in my bed. . .don't know if this qualifies as a proud moment or a cry for help
I'm killing it this week, I've peed my pants and put my vibrator into the washing machine.
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
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