dude facebook disabled my account because im registered under a false identity. now in order to get it back, i have to prove that it's really my name. i sent them an email and had to sign it "Cordially, Lloyd Pancakes"
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
theres a kid in a leopard robe and sunglasses filling up a gas tank. i miss college
Currently shopping online for cardboard cutouts of various horror characters. That should teach me roommates to stop taking acid on Tuesdays.
I think it says something about my life when I start picking up girls while im in rehab. And I don't think it's good.
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
i'm pretty sure you can't sue someone for "Taking a shit on my kitchen floor."
Idk how I even got accepted into college because literally the only things my brain ever thinks about are YouTube videos of baby animals and sex.
My Sexting was not on an AP level
Who the fuck stole my fridge again
how soon in a friendship can you start calling them a motherfucker
i was so proud for not passing out at the same time as usual. i screamed that i had a "new personal best!" then some jackass explained daylight savings.
Holy shit dude........stairs
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
Randomize
