i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
I AM OVULATING LIKE A STEAM ENGINE.
Your like the Mozart of blow jobs, you make every other girl seem like cheesy elevator music.
He fell asleep and I'm awkwardly laying here because all I have to wear is my tutu. I'm pretty sure his roommate is going to be back soon so this should be fun. This is my life now. PS. the background of his phone is a picture of his hedgehog.
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
She spilled creme de menthe on her crotch and I told her she looked like a menstruating Vulcan (costume idea!). Obviously, I went home alone.
Boob shaped ice luge is ordered for my bday. Boom
I can't even drink.
The liquor comes out the nipples. Out. The. Nipples.
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
Long story short I'm making an I'm sorry card for a girl I dont remember having sex with
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
Vacuum the place before you go out of town there are random glitter cocks everywhere
Think I was still drunk when I woke up cause I went and bought a mandolin
Bring vodka when you get back from court.
I love how my parents bring water bottles filled with vodka on family trips
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
Randomize
