Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
i think i have herpe
just one?
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
Just so we're clear. I'm still making jello shots and bringing them to the bar in my purse. I don't care if its half off margaritas. Don't want anyone thirsty
Within 24 hours, I went to a feminist documentary screening with two state reps and you hate fucked a rent-a-cop on the helipad of your hospital. Somewhere our lives went in different directions.
I still make more money.
No no no no no no.... That's my emergency bottle for when I realize I've hit rock bottom
Btw... when someone is licking your balls, "yeah... that's not the worst thing in the world" is not an appropriate compliment/thank you.
And then after we fucked he wouldn't stop calling me "champ". It was like I had sex with an extremely attractive soccer coach
We had sex in the morning in pregnant lady position. Like fuck me like the hott piece of ass that I am, not your wife of 7 years.
I'm sorry about the fire. I was too fucked up to do science, apparently.
you can't just call dibs on my vagina bro.
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
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