Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
there is this woman at the counter who looks identical to linda ellerbee. and she's grinning. COME. INSIDE. NOW.
Are we still dressing up as garden gnomes for halloween?
No. I would like to get laid again before I graduate.
Thank God for cruise control and the Starbucks cup I had to puke in.
You know you're deprived when the only thing you taste while chewing gum is the 2 grams of sugar alcohol.
WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE CONCERNED ABOUT THE SEAGULL IN THE OVEN
Let me tell you how my drug dealer wants me to take his girlfriends little sister to jr prom
I have so many plans for this weekend and sobriety is not invited.
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
reason #1 why i should never live alone: i haven't put pants on since she left 26 hours ago. and ive made spaghetti 3 times.
I just got offered money for pictures of my boobs
I accepted the offer
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
Randomize
