where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
did I really admit that id have sex with that cougar had I been more drunk?...ugh...i need to masterbate more
So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
I was arrested last night for attempting to flee and elude. I wasn't really trying to run from the police. I was drunk and lost in the woods. I thought it was pretty obvious when I was waving at them from my puddle of puke that I wasn't really hiding.
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
are you excited because you wanna see me or because you wanna get laid?
bc i get to see you. naked.
happy find a boyfriend by next Valentines Day. Its like a new years resolution but depressing
Step one go to argentina step two fuck bitches it's a simple plan really
Didn't get carded at the bar. We're getting wasted and then walking over to Bass Pro Shops to watch the indoor ducks swim around. And possibly buying a tent.
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
I woke up to his balls in my face, so naturally I limboed under him and headed to the bathroom. When I came out he was asleep on the floor.
I had sex with a mask on because I have the flu and I didn't want to get him sick.
I think I had Hypothermia but was too drunk to notice.
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
Randomize
