Why did every guy I have ever slept with have to come into the library today?
yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
dude we were making out and she kept singing the americas next top model song. you wanna be on top?
Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
The last thing I remembered was laying in the bathtub fully clothed with the shower running while he was picking grilled cheese out of my hair. I couldn't figure out if i was more upset about being soaking wet or the fact that my grilled cheese was in my hair instead of my mouth.
Marshall is naming all the elements of my face. I love science nerds.
I got so drunk last night that I drunk texted myself. "hand jobs are the currency of the future"
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
we're so committed to being not committed
When I woke up today i said I will NOT sleep with her. This morning I did the walk of shame into work wearing the same clothes... How was your Monday?
I just had mom give me advice about how and where to store my lube in my shower. It was super awkward. Of course, she also walked in on me masturbating once so I guess turnabout is fair play
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