As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
I'm just planning on experiencing Disney as adult style as it gets. Drinking bloody mary's at dawn and telling all the kids waiting in lines how badly their future sucks and that Santa isn't real.
I'm serious. My alarm label is "BAR TABS" as motivation for me to wake up in the morning and go to work.
I think I'm just gonna be a cat and wear slutty black clothes with some eyeliner on my face and pretend my ears got stolen by a drunk guy
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
Accomplishment of the day: changing my tampon at 38,000 ft with turbulence. Fasten seatbelt sign was definitely on.
First. I had the strength. Now. I am the death.
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
He put his SoundCloud on his Tinder bio. I felt personally attacked.
I passed up getting laid last night. It's almost been a YEAR - what the Hell was I thinking, being so choosy??
Omg i got really stoned and used a makeup app on my grandma...well, I’m definitely not adopted
Matt is trying to convince me that we have a deal where if I show him my tits he won't do cocaine. Apparently we shook hands on it?
Randomize