do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
I'm home now. bring me food and boobies
Tampa is so boring. I'm dying. I want lots of cleavage at my funeral. If i cant get laid, i want my friends to. I'm that kind of person
He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him.
Women are fucking wierd. I have forgotten this. Divorce papers should come with a handbook.
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
It's been so long that I've occasionally forgotten I own a vagina
You kept mumbling that you could become one with the carpet as you proceeded to give yourself the worst carpet burn I have ever seen
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
I was gonna buy a KIA, but then I remembered how awesome the sex was in the back of a Hyundai so I went with that.
I sent him this really overly apologetic text asking him out. It was just sad. Not even 27 shots of whiskey can grow me a self-esteem.
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
What kind of present accurately says to my male suitemate "I'm sorry that I accidentally flashed you my vagina while I was super drunk"?
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
Randomize