Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
Hes a 32 yr old divorced sailor that calls me almost every night drunk begging me to call him big daddy. I think i might need to change my number.
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
He took me to the bathroom in the gay bar to "just cuddle." Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice...well...
Also, hurry up because I don't like drinking alone. I'm still doing it, but I don't like it.
No, but I woke up here and my pockets are full of raisins. Like 6 different pockets.
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
i just had diarrhea that people from the 1930's would have died from
When is the right time to ask your new roommate for her school schedule so she doesn't walk in on you fucking some rando in the kitchen in the middle of the afternoon?
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
just woke up and had to check if i still had pants on, i really need to stop drinking
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
I want to disappear from this job like a fart in the wind.💨
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