it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too.
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
Let the vodka take you where it will. Like Pocahontas, but wasted
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
You told us that you were going to become a 'new man' and threw your tv set out of a window.
When he breaks your heart after he reveals he's gay, I'll be there for you. -Love, Dad
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
This is why I only drink in places with a C or D health rating
Doing a walk of shame at Wal-Mart at 3:30am because when I left at 11pm I was getting milk
I just walked into my kitchen and my little brother is standing with his face two inches from the clock, staring at it, and eating an apple. I asked wtf he was doing and he just goes "the hour hand is moving VERY slowly".
Randomize
