Its not alright that i make out with a manican.
I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
Rent Disney Oceans. Smoke a bowl. Fast forward to the seal section. Then call me.
Just beat 2 Norwegian women in beer pong. Never been so proud to be an American.
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
He's probably hung over. I sure as hell am. I want to pop out my eyeballs with a fork and soak them in cold water
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
Pretty sure I was high. I thought there was music coming out of my makeup bag.
I just remembered that last night I ate nachos off of someone else's table with a stranger
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
I be dancing. See you soon. You can drink tequila from my pants.
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
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