I mean, you're like my second best best friend we're so close I can't believe you'd do that to me
margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
No stitches, just platelets and will power
you woke me up just to tell me that I was beautiful in every way possible. Then you proceeded to fall asleep with your mouth on my boob.
how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me.
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
Why the hell did you smack that girls beer out of her hand at the end of the night then buy her a double jack and coke for?
Its called bad cop laid cop.
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
As i was laying there shouting that he dislocated my hip he actually reached his armed around and patted himself on the back
I'm not worried. All I have to do is not be the drunkest painter at 8:00. Golden.
So instead of going to meet her mom, I decided to jump out of her window which was about 1.5 stories off the ground. I'm alright, but I ended up meeting her mom anyway.
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
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