apparently i'm not the first person wake up and realize she's ugly cuz i tore this house apart and there is no sign of my clothes
Decided to write a book called "girls don't poop and other myths I wish I still believed in"
And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
He was in me and said I can't believe this happened because of facebook. MOOD KILLER.
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
He came in like 30 seconds. That's how I know he hasn't been cheating on me while I've been gone
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
My fuck buddy and I talked about Amelia Bedilia for ten minutes before having sex. I think I'm in love.
I think the hamburger goblin stole my cigarettes. I left my purse behind her table and they're not in it now.
Randomize
