do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
I thought spray tan was a myth
?
You know, something that only happens in Jersey
I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
Remind me to tell you the "if you give a mouse a special brownie" story when you get back
You fell asleep leaning on my shoulder at the bar
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
He asked her to marry him and she said yes. There is NO WAY she knows about his penchant for wearing lingerie.
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
Oh my god the guy at DQ just gave me the number 69 and winked at me
His mom came while we were asleep naked and started asking me about my plans after high school... Is that even a thing.
What the hell was that?
Genius. It was sheer genius.
Randomize
