ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
I'm driving in the middle of nowhere, and I just saw a stuffed Barney hanging from a noose on a tree. Maybe I should turn around.
we were watching porn and trying to copy the position they were doing now i think my hip is dislocated
You go to school with some of the ugliest girls I've ever seen... How are you not getting laid?
Can you do me a favor and fuck someone with a car so I can get a ride home?
I don't know if its because i'm stoned or what but painting my kitchen yellow makes it look crooked
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
Dude the animal human society told us we could get a dog when we came back sober. I cant wait.
You said your face felt like it was made out out of boxes and kept asking me to give you a bath.
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
I think I just legit sprained my wrist from holding myself up while giving a blow J. God dammit come already
I’m a coke loving, addy selling, pot smoking CRIMINOLOGY major. If there isn't irony in that I give up.
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
Randomize
