I am drinking with my family and the average drinking tolerance is a shot and a half. I feel like the incredible hulk.
no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
I woke up in bed alone w 2 bite marks on my boob... Salt and pepper shakers In my purse along w a bottle of steak sauce.... The drunkasauraus has struck again
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
i'm calling it my monica lewinsky shirt now. may it live forever in infamy.
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
his penis was like the majestic horn of a unicorn and I came like a million trumpeting rainbows.
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
I almost wrecked my car because of a guy in skinny jeans had a boner
I'm like a bad decision making factory. I need to sit down and have a chat with my decision making elves.
If work found out I was using THEIR paper to write Karate Kid fanfic I'd never hear the end of it.
Randomize
