i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
I'm a fake celebrity on twitter. I need a life.
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
I can do anything tonight that doesnt involve an erection.
My math professor just asked us to draw the graph of the derivative of our drunkenness from friday to sunday. Dear Jesus this looks bad.
No, she passed out instead. I have the worst luck, its like Jesus is mad at me for having the same birthday as him
there's sperm and chicken noodle soup everywhere
He's the kind of drunk guy that would pee in your mouth while you give him head.
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
Randomize
