So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
On a scale of "impaired judgement" to "Mel Gibson," how drunk are you?
Toaster
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
He taught me how to drive a stick by using his dick. He even made the whurrrr noise so I knew when to change gears.
You made me wash my hair in the kitchen sink while eating bay leaves
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
I made a list on my phone of places I want to fuck, it's right under my list of groceries I'm getting a little too used to regular sex but dude monogamy is the shit
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
He saw my Halloween/ Costume closet and assumed I’m into cosplay. I’m going with it. What’s sexier, a cop or a nurse?
Randomize
