im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
I wake up every morning and wish that I didn't have to wear a bra
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
We have video of him nailing the sex doll to my wall and putting all the monopoly pieces in her nose
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
call me with an emergency in 5 min. This chick has a strap on hangin behind the bathroom door.
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
Alex I've come up with a new medical condition. dick depression. it's a real thing and I have it
Not sure how but he broke three of his fingers while giving a blowjob. How does someone that accident prone survive to adulthood?
I have a burn on my hand, I'm covered in bruises, I think my toe is broken, and I have no clothes to wear home.
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize
