I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
i totally just wrapped her wedding gift in tin foil. These are the skills 2 bachelor's degrees have given me.
Woke up in my own bed with a "New Years Eve 2011" bar bracelet on. Both of these things confuse me.
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
they adjusted my tv to black and white ... i thought i drank myself to colorblindness
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
Sorry i vommed in a cup next to u w out warning.. Actually im not that sorry cuz i didn't spill a drop LIKE A PRO
Sometimes intelligent conversation doesn't mix well with a romantic interest. It's possible the two are best kept separate. Toys should just stay in the toy box.
According to the arrest report, I shouted "no, YOU put some pants on" at the cop. Downhill from there.
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
Randomize
