thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
I'll even be awesome and bring pizza for your family, just as a "hey thanks for letting a stranger get trashed at your house" gesture.
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
The ketchup exploded, and totally splooged his face and the wall. You could see the outline of his head in the wall splatter.
The dude at Coffee Bean just handed me my tea latte and whispered, "pomegranate blueberry is such a sexy flavor". With a wink. I'm almost certain that there's an STD floating around in my drink.
Martha Stewart has had a one night stand and is unsure if she's had a threesome. I no longer feel slutty.
He was lasting forever and I couldn't take it so I faked an asthma attack
I still can't believe that dog licked my nipple.
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Randomize