Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
don't ever try to run hungover. just puked mid-run in front of an old couple that were going for a walk. they were horrified.
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
Someone played tic tac toe on my abs?
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
Breaking up as roommates was a poor life decision. I'm sorry. Thank you for never shitting on the floor.
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
I think he's hit rock bottom. You know it's a low point in life when you cry because you weren't invited to sit in a box car and watch porn with two other straight dudes.
Don't be embarrassed its me, I've licked your taint.
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
But I'm a half a mile from my bed. And I have the hiccups. I hate hiccups.
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
she doesn't even know what year it is. She just stumbles around life with a bottle of rum
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
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