end the night at a gay bar...not sure how...but why the fuck do i have two condoms in my pocket?
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
This is getting ridiculous. See/touch her boobs=good day. Not see/not touch her boobs=bad day. I am legitimately depressed over the lack of tits in my hands right now.
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
I may or may not have just sent the bartender a pic of me in my slutty cheerleader costume with the caption "rah rah ree, gimme yo d"
Nobody has seen her in 3 days. Should we call the cops or hope this is just another drunk Carmen San Diego game she's playing?
DUDE EDDIE MURPHY JUST DID A BODY SHOT OFF A HOOKER. IM NEVER COMING HOME
The bellhop gave us weed in our keycard envelop. We went down to tip him and he apparently never gets that so he just gave us more weed. Kentucky is strange
Actually, I may scrap this entire plan. I just realized that I had sex with a guy with his own whiskey commercial.
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
