Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.
Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
I asked my mother if she peed on that chair, she said "not bad" There is no good level of pee on a chair.
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
do you realize that she was the awkward lesbian in high school and now bangs more girls than probably both of us combined?!
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
I fucked his roommate. And that roommate's best friend. And my roommate. And my roommate's old roommate.
i'm bowing down, but slow your roll.
i ordered what the bartender said was called a pink cock, and kept saying it tastes like a disney princess. thats how my 21st bday went
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