Public safety found my id!
And i can't find my bra so i'm assuming they found my bra with my id which would explain the disapproving tone the lady on the phone had.
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
The sun and I are not on speaking terms this morning
My mouth is so dry that I'm about to put a straw in a jar of Vaseline and chug. This all addi diet definitely has its ups and downs.
If you get any calls give me a heads up. Im drinking rum in my underwear on the back porch.
Odd start to the day - the FBI just showed up at my apartment.
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
You shouldn't play strip poker when you're having a wet fart kind of day.
Waking up next to a guy you don't remember going home with and the first thing you say is: where is my tiara? = successful birthday
I have in my possession one ukulele shaped package.
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
Randomize
