i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
she added me on facebook and her celebrity doppelganger is rosie odonnel. FUCK
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
getting a black eye the first day of spring break really sets the tone for the rest of the week.
Can you come get Dustin he's putting taco bell fire sauce on cigarettes trying to light them again.
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
Apparently I really was petting a bunny named lazarus in Jimmy Johns last night.
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
YOU IS KIND. YOU IS SMART. YOU IS IMPORTANT. YOU IS CLEANING YOUR OWN VOMIT.
I've spent my afternoon dipping strawberries in DayQuil if that's any indication of where I'm at in life.
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
Nothing like ripping open the box with your keys on a sat R train and throwing back the morning after pill with some coconut water on my way to work at a fitness studio for free
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
Randomize
