this girl with a french braid down the center of her head won't stop talking about the benefits of the free market. i'm hungover, bloated and haven't slept for 4 days. shut up french braid girl, shut up.
Pray the makeout fairy visits me this weekend.
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
You are in charge of making sure that her vagina explodes with joy tonight.
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
He autographed my vag. This fuck just got authentic.
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
Anal on new furniture sounds like a quickest way to violate a warranty
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