Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
New discovery: conditioner is better for jerking off than baby oil. Fuck yes.
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
I'm just planning on experiencing Disney as adult style as it gets. Drinking bloody mary's at dawn and telling all the kids waiting in lines how badly their future sucks and that Santa isn't real.
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
You said you liked how I put the cream cheese on.
He pulled out a red and green condom and then started humming "Here Comes Santa Claus." Happy holidays indeed.
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
I planned out my poor life choices for the weekend.
All i want from a relationship is to get drunk watch pirates of the Caribbean and have sex
Randomize
