why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
an off duty cop drove behind me last night to make sure i didnt get a dui. i was blacked out drunk and on a pill of ecstacy. he knew this. i must be really pretty.
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
Apparently while trying to get up from vomiting in the toilet I grabbed the seat cover for leverage and smashed my own head between it and the bowl. I don't remember this.
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
I'm not even the least bit surprised that I whored myself out for tiramisu
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
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