I think i found my new favorite workout. Go to a party where you dont know anybody and constantly walk around the house so you dont look awkward standing alone. im up to 1.8 miles
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
Next time I feel awkward in a situation I'm going to just yell "free bird!!!!" Like some redneck at lynyrd skynyrd show
Could you just like have a friend who feels bad for me and secretly always wanted to have sex with me
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
Did you actually just quote Ace Ventura during a sext!?
You know it
Dammit now I have to marry you
the most terrified I've ever been was seeing Danny Devito squirming on the ground in this underwear, covered in hand sanitizer, completely hairless
Well drunk me was looking out for sober me again, hid the beer and bought another case for me
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
If you have been drunk at one point during the day and are going to bed sober that same day, something is very wrong.
Randomize
